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About Drogheda

What gets me happy? The thrill, mate. You match, chat, vibe—bam, fireworks! Like nature’s finest courtship rituals, but with emojis. This one time, I saw a bloke use a penguin gif to flirt—pure genius, had me laughin’ like a hyena. But the anger? Oh, the catfishes! Liars with fake pics—makes me wanna roar, “You’re not an algorithm, you’re a worm!” Surprised me how many dodge real connection, just chasin’ a quick shag.

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So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping, all that jazz. I’m like, “Sweet, today’s gonna be easy.” But then I step outside on St. Agnes Road, and boom! The smell of fried food hits me. I swear, the chipper on the corner was frying up something fierce. I could practically taste the vinegar from the fish and chips.

Death Notice of Dermot Delaney (Crumlin, Dublin)