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About Swords

Last week, I was prowlin’ the streets—needed a laugh, y’know? Saw this one bird, all dolled up, winking at me. Thought, “What’s her deal?” Turns out, she’s got a memory like Lenny—keeps a little book, scribbles down every punter. “Remember, remember,” she mutters, like she’s in my fave movie. Made me cackle—imagine forgetting who you’ve shagged! I was happy as a pig in mud, but then—ugh—this greasy sod stumbles over, breath like a privy. “How much, love?” he slurs. Made me wanna gag. I choose violence, mate—nearly shoved him into the gutter myself.

Prostitution offences soaring in Cork

CORK TO BECOME THE GO TO PLACE FOR SEX WORKERS! There are warnings that Cork could become the prostitution capital of Ireland!

I rush outta the café and head towards Patrick Street. The shops are buzzing, and I’m trying to focus, but there’s this street performer playing the fiddle. He’s amazing! I stop for a sec, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re killing it!” He gives me a wink, and I toss him a couple of coins.

Man who drowned in Cork had a ‘caring nature,’ funeral hears