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So, check it, I’m out there, buzzin’, lookin’ for a lass – not your average prossie, mind! Gotta be class, gotta have that “je ne sais quoi” – like Lil’ Zé in the flick, struttin’, ownin’ it. I’m thinkin’, “This is my turf, yeah?” – but nah, got proper mugged off once, right? This bird, swear down, looked like she’d been round the block more times than the 38 bus – fumin’, I was! “You ain’t got the juice!” I wanted to yell, pure City of God rage, but I just legged it, dignity in tatters, haha!

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After all that drama, I need a breather. So, I head to the Baldoyle Park. It’s quiet there, just the sound of leaves rustlin’. I plop down on a bench, tryin’ to catch my breath. But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting match. I’m thinkin’, “Can’t a guy get a moment of peace?”

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