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Me? I’m old-school, alright? Sex-dating ain’t my jam—I’d rather debate healthcare than fake a smile over drinks. But I ain’t judgin’—well, maybe a lil’. It’s wild how folks’ll post nudes faster than I can say “Medicare for All!” Surprised me at first, made me happy too—people ownin’ their bodies, stickin’ it to the prudish 1%. But then I see the creeps, the catfishes, the “send pics” losers, and I’m like, “Are ya kiddin’ me?!” This one time, my buddy’s niece—she’s 24, sweet kid—got a dick pic from some Wall Street sleaze. She texted back, “I find you disgusting,” and I cheered so loud I woke the neighbors!

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As I’m about to leave, I bump into an old friend from school. We haven’t seen each other in ages! We start chatting, and it’s like no time has passed. We reminisce about the good ol’ days, hanging out at the Arklow Bay Hotel, sneaking into the pool. Good times, man.

Arklow school’s car boot sale raises huge sum for playground and sensory upgrades