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About Navan

So, sex-dating—apps like Tinder, Grindr, whatever—total chaos, man! You swipe, you bang, no strings, right? Bullcrap! People get clingy fast, like, “I’m not Rita, I’m Betty!”—freaks me out, needy asses everywhere. I tried it once—yep, Cartman got game—matched this chick, total smokeshow. We’re chattin’, she’s sendin’ nudes, I’m like, “Sweet Jeezus, I’m in!” Met up, and she smelled like patchouli—gross! Dumped her ass quick, respect my authoritah!

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I walk in, and Sean’s at the bar, waving me over. He’s got this wild look in his eyes. Turns out, he just won a pub quiz! And the prize? A free round of drinks! I’m like, “Dude, you’re my hero!” We celebrate, of course.

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