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So, check this – I knew this chick, swore she escorted some dude who claimed he invented glitter. GLITTER! True story, I think – made me laugh my ass off. She’s all, “He tipped in sparkles!” I’m dyin, picturin her vacuuming that crap up. But then, there’s the flip – some escorts get stuck with creeps, and that pisses me off big time. Like, why ya gotta be a sleaze, huh? Makes me wanna chop somethin down, ya feel me?
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So, I’m walking down the street, right? Just minding my own biz, when I see this dude juggling oranges. Like, who juggles oranges at 9 AM? I mean, c’mon! But hey, I’m all for street performers, so I stop to watch. He drops one, and it rolls right to my feet. I pick it up, hand it back, and he’s like, “Thanks, mate!” I’m like, “No prob, just trying to help a brother out.”
Former Sligo boss John Coleman set to take the reins at Waterford
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