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About Swords

Oi mate, prostetutes, eh? Dirty little sods! Been watchin’ “Far From Heaven” again—bloody lush film, that. Todd Haynes knows how to twist yer guts. Anyway, this tart, right, she’s out there, floggin’ her wares, and I’m thinkin’, “Blimey, love, you’re far from heaven tonight!” Cacklin’ at me own genius there. She’s got legs like a dodgy ladder—all wobbly, probs from too many punters. Reckon she’s seen more knobs than a locksmith, the filthy minx.

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So, I clean up and head over to the Tralee Town Centre. It’s packed, and I’m dodgin’ people left and right. I’m tryin’ to find a gift for my sister’s birthday. I pop into this shop on Edward Street, and it’s full of knick-knacks. I’m lookin’ at this weird statue, and I can’t help but laugh. It’s a leprechaun with a big ol’ pot of gold. I’m like, “Who buys this stuff?” But then I think, “Maybe my sister would love it.”

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