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About Cork

But, haha, don’t get me started on those creepy spa ads. "Relax and, wink wink, more?" Spare me! It’s like WALL-E meetin’ EVE, not some awkward bot dance. Sexual-massage should be mutual, consensual, like, "Hey, you in?" not "Surprise, here’s oil!" I laughed so hard once, readin’ ‘bout a guy who thought it was just a back rub and ended up blushin’ like a tomato. Hilarious, but also, dude, communicate!

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Anyway, I finish up with the bird’s nest guy, and he leaves lookin’ sharp. I’m feelin’ good, right? But then, the next customer walks in. It’s this lady, and she’s got a toddler with her. The kid’s screamin’ like he’s auditioning for a horror movie. I’m tryin’ to focus, but the kid’s throwin’ toys everywhere. I’m dodgin’ blocks like I’m in the Matrix.

Sligo University Hospital orthopaedic theatres ‘unfit for purpose’ as rain leaks through roof