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What gets my goat, though? Them high-and-mighty types actin’ like they ain’t never sinned. Honey, I’ve seen preachers sneakier’n a fox in a henhouse! Makes me madder’n a hornet. But what tickles me pink? The gals with sass—ones who’ll tell ya, “Sugar, you ain’t worth my time!”—and strut off like queens. Gotta admire that grit. Little-known fact: back in the ‘70s, some workin’ gals in Nashville had a secret code—red ribbon on the purse meant “busy,” blue meant “open.” Ain’t that clever? Kept the law off their tails!
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So, I roll outta bed, grab my coffee from that little spot on Sandymount Strand. You know the one? The one with the best scones. I’m talking about the kind that makes you forget your diet. Anyway, I’m chugging my coffee, and I see this seagull. This dude swoops down, snatches my scone, and just flies off. Like, really? I’m just tryna enjoy my morning!
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