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About Drogheda

Dunno, mate, it’s a rum do. Some reckon it’s sleazy, others call it art. Me? I’m torn – love a good rub, hate the faff. Last time, slipped off the bleedin’ table – oil everywhere, looked like a greased pig! “The harmony’s broken,” I yell, quotin’ the flick, sprawled on me arse. Laughed so hard I nearly wept. You tried it? Reckon it’s worth a punt, or am I talkin’ bollocks? Tell ya what, it’s a butcher’s dream – all that kneadin’, but wivout the cleaver!

Nobody is coming soon

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Back at the office, it’s chaos. Phones ringing off the hook. I’m juggling calls like a circus clown. One guy’s yelling about his bill, another’s asking about service in Glenageary. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a walking map!” But I keep my cool. Kinda.

Death Notice of Harry Kenny (Monkstown, Dublin)