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Once – true story – caught my buddy. Mid-rubdown. Shady joint – downtown. Walked in – BOOM! Dim lights. Smelled like lavender – and sin. He’s all – “Chris! Don’t judge!” I’m like – JUDGE? I’m jealous! Wanted to yell – “This is MY scene!” – movie vibes again. That wild energy? Surprised me. Thought I’d be mad – nah. Happy for him – sorta. Selfish me – wanted a turn! Ever felt that? Cravin’ it – bad?

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Then, outta nowhere, I see my buddy Liam. He’s always up to something. He’s like, “Let’s go to the river!” So, we head down to the River Fergus. It’s beautiful, but the wind is wild! I’m trying to take a selfie, and my hair’s all over the place. I look like a tornado hit me. Liam’s cracking up, and I’m like, “Shut up, man! I’m a work of art!”

Death Notice of David Ennis (Athboy, Meath)