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Well, hey there, sugar! It’s me, Dolly, ramblin’ ‘bout somethin’ spicy—erotic-massage! Lordy, I ain’t no highfalutin’ scholar, but I reckon I got thoughts bouncin’ round my noggin like a pinball machine. Erotic-massage, y’all—it’s like butter on hot cornbread, smooth and melty, but oh-so-dangerous if ya ain’t careful! I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout that movie *Shame*—you know, my fave—where Brandon’s all tangled up in his own mess, chasin’ that high, that release. “I find you disgusting,” his sister Sissy spits at him, and honey, sometimes that’s what I feel ‘bout folks who turn a good rubdown into somethin’ sleazy!

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So, I decide to head over to the Ennis Friary. You know, the one on Francis Street? It’s got that old-school vibe, and I’m all about it. I’m wandering around, soaking in the history, when I bump into this old lady. She’s like, “You look lost, dear.” I’m like, “Nah, just exploring!” But honestly, I was kinda lost. She starts telling me about the friary’s ghosts. I’m like, “Great, now I’m haunted too?”

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