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About Dublin

So, last week—god, was it last week?—I’m out, cruisin downtown, feelin all hot n bothered. Wanted to find a pro, someone who knows the game. Not these fake-ass posers, ya know? I’m talkin real deal—street smart, sassy, maybe even a lil dangerous. Like Anger in *Inside Out*—all fired up, ready to explode! I see this chick, leather skirt, smokin a cig—thought, “Bingo, she’s it.” But nah, turns out she’s just some hipster waitin for her Uber. Pissed me off—wasted my damn time!

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Later, I’m back at it, sharpening a set of garden shears. This lady comes up, all frantic. “My hedges are outta control!” she says. I’m like, “Lady, it’s not my fault your garden looks like a jungle!” But I sharpen ‘em up, and she’s so happy. She gives me a tip! I’m like, “Wow, I’m rich!”

New principal appointed for three Tipperary schools