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About Cork

Say hello to my little friend! Sexual-massage, man, it’s a trip. I’m Tony Montana, I see shit others don’t. Like, you know “Her,” that flick I love? Joaquin’s all lonely, fallin’ for a damn voice. Sexual-massage ain’t that, but it’s close—hands talkin’ to your soul, bro. I got this chick once, right, in Miami, she’s rubbin’ me down, oil everywhere, and I’m like, “In this world, I got everything!”—total “Her” vibes, that connection, y’know?

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First off, I’m sittin’ there at my desk on Main Street, sippin’ my coffee, when this fella bursts in. He’s all wild-eyed, like he just saw a ghost or somethin’. Turns out, he’s got a hot tip on a horse named “Lucky Leprechaun.” I’m thinkin’, “Great, another dreamer.” But he’s so hyped, I can’t help but get caught up in it. So, I take his bet. Spoiler alert: that horse didn’t even finish the race. I mean, c’mon!

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