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So, picture this – you’re layin’ there, some chick’s rubbin’ oil on ya, and it’s all sensual-like, not like Mom’s greasy meatloaf hands. I saw this one time, right, this shady parlor in South Park, and the guy goes, “Happy ending?” – I’m like, “Hell yea, make it quick!” Got me all happy, like when Dae-su finds that hammer, “Can I be forgiven?” – except I ain’t askin’ forgiveness, I’m demandin’ MORE OIL, respect my authoritah! Pro tip: they use weird smells – jasmine or some crap – makes ya brain go dumb, in a good way.

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So, I hit the streets of Wedi, cruisin’ down Jalan Raya. The sun was blazin’, and I was feelin’ good. But then, BAM! Outta nowhere, this dude on a scooter zooms past me. Almost took my leg off! I’m like, “Bro, chill! This ain’t the Indy 500!”

Trump’s Paris Agreement withdrawal poses challenges and opportunities for South Africa