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Lemme tell ya, last week—swipe right, hot chick, right? We’re chattin’, she’s like, “meet up tonight?” I’m thinkin’, “How you doin’?”—Joey’s got this! We hit this dive bar, she’s smokin’, I’m droolin’. But—plot twist—she’s got a boyfriend! Just wanted “fun” on the side. I’m like, “What am I, chopped liver?” Made me mad, yo—don’t play me like that! But also—kinda hot? Sneaky sex-dating vibes, ya feel me?

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Then, I hit this market. Oh boy, the hustle! I’m trying to haggle for some souvenirs. This lady is like, “50,000 rupiah!” I’m like, “Nah, how about 20,000?” We go back and forth, and I’m sweating bullets. Finally, I settle for 30,000. I feel like a champ, but also like I just fought a battle.

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