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About Bandung

So I’m riffin’ on my six-string, right? Thinkin’—why’s this even a thing? Back in ’05, Cronenberg knew—people hide shit. You match with some chick, she’s all “I’m sweet, love hikes,” then you meet—bam! She’s got a shank and a felony. “I thought I left that life behind,” she says, like Viggo in the diner scene! I’m over here laughin’—neurotic, sweaty laugh—‘cause I tried it once, y’know? Met this gal, profile said “guitarists are hot.” Flattered me, sure! Date’s goin’ fine, then she’s like, “Let’s bang now.” I’m thinkin’, “Whoa, slow down, I barely tuned my Strat!” Felt like Tom Stall dodgin’ bullets—too much, too fast!

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out. Just like that! I’m standing there, all confused. The lights flicker, and the espresso machine? Dead. I’m like, “Noooo! Not today!” The customers start grumbling. I’m sweating bullets. I grab a flashlight from under the counter. “Surprise! It’s a candlelit coffee experience!”

Two-year-old girl hit on head by falling metal bar at Sengkang playground