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Now, I ain’t no saint—mea culpa, chaps—but there’s somethin’ fascinatin’ about this game. Did ya know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Proper poetic, innit? Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ of some toff in a top hat, whisperin’ that down an alley. Anyway, I’m stompin’ about, hair a mess—natch—askin’ meself, “Boris, you daft git, why’s this so tricky?” Like trackin’ a ghost, it is—here one sec, gone the next.

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But then, I see a couple fightin’. Like, come on, guys! Not in public! They’re yellin’ and throwin’ stuff. I’m just sittin’ there, tryin’ to enjoy my day, and these two are makin’ it awkward. I roll my eyes and move to another bench.

S.C. National Guard prepares for the worst on Sampit River