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So, escort—fancy word for “paid pal,” right? Ha! I bet half these guys are just lonely saps with too much dough. Saw this one time, legit, some rich jerk in Springfield hired an escort to just sit and watch TV with him. D’oh! Coulda called me, I’d do it for a donut! Little known fact—back in the 80s, escort gigs were all hush-hush, coded ads in newspapers, like “call for a good time.” Sneaky bastards! Made me laugh, thinkin’ how they’d whisper, “I’m not a john, I’m a gentleman!”

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But then, back to the grind. Next up, a group of teenagers. They’re loud, obnoxious, and full of energy. They pile in, and I’m like, “Whoa, easy there!” They’re all talkin’ about the latest TikTok trends and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. One of ‘em, this dude with bright blue hair, starts doin’ some dance moves in the elevator. I’m like, “Bro, this ain’t a club!” But I can’t help but laugh.

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