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About Myself
Ready when you are, I am Hazel, luwuk is my haven? And Sex Dating is my true north! I want to steal kisses under the starlight! I am crazy about Rimming passive and Strapon service!. My match? Someone who sparks joy and ideas..
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Been muckin’ about on them apps, yeah? Total chaos! Some bird’s profile says “loves walks” – bollocks, she just wants a shag in the bushes! Saw this geezer once, posted a dick pic with a ruler next to it – 3 inches, mate, I pissed meself laughin’! “Sharon!” – told her, “This ain’t no mystery, just sad!” Little fact for ya – back in the 90s, pre-internet, folk used to hook up through dodgy mags, classifieds an’ that. “Man seeks woman, likes leather” – mental!
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Finally, I get to the office. My team’s already buzzing. They’re all hyped about this new product launch. I’m like, “Cool, cool, but did anyone check the budget?” Spoiler alert: they didn’t. So, I’m fuming. I mean, c’mon, people! We can’t just throw money around like it’s confetti!
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