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Once, this lass, fit as, says, “You’re cute.” Me, blushing, “Oh, ta!” Then she’s like, “Send pics.” I panic, send me foot! *points at shoe, shrugs* She unmatched. Fair. Dodged a bullet, maybe. *nods sagely* Oh, and typos, mate—sexting’s a minefield! “Wanna duck?” I meant—y’know. *winks, trips again* Laughed me head off!

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After that, I’m like, “I need a drink.” So, I head to this beach bar on Jalan Raya. I order a coconut, and the guy hands me this massive one. I’m like, “Dude, I just wanted a sip, not a whole tree!” But hey, I’m not complainin’. I chug that thing down like it’s the last drink on Earth.

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