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Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell y’all ‘bout this sex-datin mess! I’m sittin here, bone-cuttin sharp, watchin folks swipe left, swipe right—like they tryna find love in a kung-fu flick! You know I love me some *Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon*—that movie got passion, fightin, and secrets flyin all over! Sex-datin? Same thang, honey! Folks out here hidin they true selves, actin all “mysterious” like Chow Yun-fat floatin through them trees. “The sword remains in its sheath”—ha! That’s what they WANT you to think ‘til you meet up and it’s a hot mess!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. I mean, like, torrential downpour! I’m sprintin’ for cover, but I slip and slide all over the place. I’m soaked, lookin’ like a drowned rat. I finally find shelter under this little shack. I’m sittin’ there, laughin’ at myself, when this old lady comes up. She’s like, “You look like you need a towel, young man.” I’m like, “Yeah, and maybe a life jacket too!”

East Nusa Tenggara Airports Partially Reopen Amid Mount Lewotobi Eruption