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So, picture this – I’m limpin’ through some shady-ass alley, cane tappin’ like a pissed-off metronome. Why? Cause I’m bored, and Vicodin ain’t cuttin’ it no more. Need somethin’ real, somethin’ raw. Prostitutes? They’re out there, hidin’ like Bin Laden in a cave. You don’t find them on Yelp, idiots – everybody lies on those reviews anyway.

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So, I rush to get ready. I’m sprinting down Jalan Raya Kebonarun, dodging motorbikes like I’m in some action movie. You know how it is—traffic here is nuts! I swear, if I had a dollar for every time I almost got hit, I’d be rich.