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Favorite flick’s got this vibe—locked-in syndrome, but make it whore edition. She’s out there, hustlin’, maybe even laughin’ at the suckers who pay up. “Other people’s bodies are a foreign country,” Schnabel says—ooh, deep! Whore’s like an explorer, right? Mappin’ out that territory, cash in hand. Surprised me how badass that feels—like, she’s not just takin’ it, she’s runnin’ the show. Snarky thought: bet she’s got better stories than my last date.

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But just when I think it’s over, I get a call about a lost kid near the market. My heart sinks. I rush over, and there he is, just chillin’ with a bunch of snacks. I’m like, “Dude, your mom’s freakin’ out!” But he’s all smiles, munchin’ away. Kids, man.

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