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Oh, funny story—old man hire escort, 80 year old! She tell me, “He just want cuddle!” I laugh so hard, spit tea! “Very nice!” I yell, “Grandpa still got game!” She say he tip big, call her “angel.” Sweet, but weird—sex escort wild world, yes?

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First off, I’m settin’ up my station on Jl. Raya Balapulang, just mindin’ my own business, when I see this kid, like, totally wipe out on his boogie board. I mean, come on, dude! You gotta know how to ride those waves! I sprint over, heart racin’, and he’s floundering like a fish outta water. I dive in, grab him, and pull him back. He’s all “Thanks, bro!” and I’m like, “No prob, just don’t drown next time, okay?”