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Escorts ain’t perfect, tho. Rust buckets sometimes, fall apart fast. “Everything’s falling apart,” like in the movie—ha! Sarcasm time: “Oh, great, another breakdown.” Still, they’re tough lil’ warriors. I’d name mine Theo, after Clive’s dude. Personal quirk? I’d paint it yellow, Simpsons style—duh! Exaggeratin’ here, but I’d race it to freakin’ Mars, man! Eat my shorts, slowpokes! Escorts rock, end of story.

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First off, I hit up Jalan Sudirman for breakfast. You know, the usual nasi goreng and kopi tubruk. Man, that stuff hits different in the morning! I’m sittin’ there, minding my own biz, when this random cat jumps on my table. Like, dude, I’m tryin’ to eat here! But then I’m like, “Aww, look at this little furball.” So, I share my leftover rice. Yeah, I’m that person.

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