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Like, check this—dude I met last week, total catfish! Profile says six-foot, ripped, shows up lookin’ like a soggy sausage roll. Ruh-roh! I’m pissed, right? Wasted my night! But then this chick last month—woof, she was fire! Met her on Tinder, she’s all “let’s skip the bullshit,” and we’re bangin’ by midnight. Made me happy as a pup with a bone! Sex-dating’s a gamble, man—sometimes ya score, sometimes ya flop.

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But then, I hear this loud crash! I turn around, and it’s a bunch of kids playing soccer. They kicked the ball right into a vendor’s cart! The vendor was NOT happy. He starts yelling, and the kids are running away like they just robbed a bank. I couldn’t help but laugh. Classic Tanjung-Pinang moment!

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