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“A Separation” lingers, tho—Simin yellin’, “You don’t know how I feel!” Hits deep, savvy? Sex-dating’s all surface, no soul sometimes. Ye swipe, ye shag, ye scarper. But me? I’m a pirate o’ taste—I’d rather a lass with fire than a quick tumble. Once sailed Tinder fer a week, got 3 dates, 2 ghosted, 1 stole me hat! Bloody brilliant chaos, that.

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So, I rush over to the stadium. It’s packed! Everyone’s wearing their jerseys, and the energy is insane. I’m just a guitar guy, but I’m feeling like a rockstar. The game starts, and it’s wild! Goals flying left and right. I’m cheering, jumping, and then—BAM! The other team scores. I’m like, “No way!”