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Oh, and the oils—don’t get me started! They’re all scented, slippery, makin’ ya feel like a goddess or somethin’. I was shocked—*shocked*—how quick I forgot the altitude sickness. Poof! Gone! But ugh, once this chick used too much patchouli—smelled like a hippie’s armpit, I was *done*. “This ain’t no dream, it’s a nightmare!” I screeched, channelin’ my inner Ellen Burstyn from the movie, ya know? *HEE-HEE-HEE!* Still, when it’s good, it’s *good*—like, “I’m goin’ crazy here!” levels of good.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, seriously? We run for cover, but we’re soaked. I’m laughing so hard, I can’t breathe. My buddy’s like, “This is the worst!” But I’m like, “Nah, this is Rembangan! Embrace the chaos!”