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Sometimes I reckon, in me head, “David, you plonker, you’d be useless at that gig.” Can’t even charm me way outta a parking ticket! But whores? They’re closin deals left, right, n center — no CRM software, just gut. Makes me wanna cry a bit, cos they’re out there, grindin, while I’m faffin with PowerPoint.

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So, we’re in this meeting, and my boss starts talking about some new project. I’m half-listening, half-daydreaming about the nasi goreng I had last night. It was bomb! But then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, asking if I wanna hit up the night market later. I’m like, “Dude, I’m in a meeting!” But I can’t help but smile. Night market? Yes, please!