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But, man, the highs? Electric. Found this chick once, artsy type, quoted Kechiche outta nowhere—“I missed you so much I couldn’t breathe.” We hooked up, talked existential crap all night. Rare gem in the sex-dating swamp. Most times it’s just “dtf?” and peace out. Still, that rush? Addictive. Whoa.

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After that, I decided to head to the market on Jl. Pahlawan. It’s always buzzing with life. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the smell of street food everywhere. I’m in my element. But then, I see this old lady struggling with her bags. I’m like, “C’mon, I gotta help her.” So I do. And she starts telling me her life story. I mean, I’m all for a good story, but I didn’t sign up for a 3-hour saga!

Eddie Van Halen, whose mother was Indonesian, dies aged 65