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But then—THEN—I get pissed, ‘cause society’s all, “Oh, how dare they!” Like, chill, Karen, they’re out here survivin’. Didja know, back in the day, some prostitutes in Paris ran secret spy rings durin’ the war? Freakin’ wild! Hustlin’ johns *and* the Nazis—talk about multi-taskin’. I’m sittin’ here imaginin’ this chick from *Ten* doin’ that, smirkin’ at some Gestapo dude while pocketin’ his cash. “You’re a fool,” she’d say, straight outta the movie, and I’d lose it laughin’.

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So, I’m walking, minding my own biz, when I spot this street vendor selling pempek. OMG, I love that stuff! I grab a few, and they’re so good, I almost forget I’m on a mission. But then, bam! My phone buzzes. It’s a student, freaking out about their future. Like, chill, dude!

Plan to test virginity of Indonesian school girls stirs public outcry