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But here’s some real talk—sex-dating ain’t all roses. Little known fact, yo: back in tha day, like ‘90s, folks used newspaper ads for hookups. Called ‘em “personals”—OG Tinder, no cap! Now it’s all apps, but same game—huntin’ for tha freaky. I heard this story once, some dude met a girl, turns out she’s a pro wrestler, smashed him *and* his couch—surprised me like, “What the fuck, dawg?!” True chaos, like Gotham on a bad night.

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Then, I decided to grab some lunch at this warung on Jl. Merdeka. The nasi goreng there is to die for! I ordered it spicy, of course. I like my food like I like my life—full of flavor and a lil’ kick! But when it came, it was like a volcano erupted in my mouth. I was sweating bullets! I mean, I love spicy, but this was next level. I was chugging water like I was in a desert.

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