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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m a dental tech, fixin’ teeth all day, and lemme tell ya ‘bout sex escorts—wild stuff, right? Judge Judy style, sharp as my dental drill, “Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain!”—that’s what I say when folks sugarcoat this gig. It ain’t all glam like in movies, nah, it’s gritty, real messy sometimes. Watched *Toni Erdmann*—you know, my fave—where that dad’s all awkward, tryna bond with his kid? Reminds me of escorts, puttin’ on a mask, playin’ a part. “Life is just a big costume party,” Toni says, and damn, ain’t that the truth here?

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But then, I overhear this couple arguing at the next table. They’re going at it, and I’m just trying to enjoy my coffee. I mean, come on! Can’t a writer get some peace? But then, the guy says something so ridiculous that I can’t help but laugh. Like, “You never let me have the last piece of fried chicken!” I’m dying.

Police say Pasuruan blasts caused by weak blast fishing explosives made by ex-terror convict