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So, sex-dating—wild stuff! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, who’s bonin’ who? Apps like Grindr, Bumble—boom, instant hookups! Little factoid for ya: back in ‘90s, folks used newspaper ads for this crap. Can ya believe it? “Single dude seeks hot babe”—lame! Now it’s all pics, DMs, sextin’—way faster, way riskier. D’oh! Makes me mad, tho—half these profiles? Fake as hell! Catfishin’ punks wastin’ my time. “Are you now fully functional?”—like Gigolo Joe says in *A.I.*, y’know? I’m wonderin’ that ‘bout every chick I match with!

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Rizky shows up. He’s got this huge grin. “You won’t believe what I found!” he says. I’m like, “What now?” He pulls out this old-school skateboard. I’m like, “Bro, where’d you get that?” Turns out, he found it at a garage sale on Jl. Sisingamangaraja. I’m dying laughing. “You’re gonna break your neck!”

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