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Once, nearly got nabbed—dumb as a bag’a hammers, me. Drove ‘round, lookin’ lost—cop flashed his lights. Heart poundin’, I’m thinkin’, “George, you idiot, this ain’t no misunderestimation!” Sped off, laughin’—happy as a clam I didn’t end up in cuffs. Prostitute’s name was Candy—swear it! Said she’d been at it since ‘98, savin’ for a trailer. Gritty gal—kinda admired her hustle.

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Jalan Legian in Kuta (picture), Puputan Badung Park in Denpasar and Sanur are the main hot spots for street hookers in Bali (late at night from around midnight).

But then, I get a call. My buddy’s in trouble. He’s stuck at a bar on Jl. Padma. I rush over, dodging scooters and tourists. I’m like, “What’s the deal?” Turns out, he lost his wallet. Classic move, right? We spend an hour retracing his steps. I’m gettin’ frustrated, but then we find it! It was in his other shorts. I’m like, “Dude, you’re a mess!”

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