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Me, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—sex-dating’s like “Finding Nemo,” ‘cept ain’t nobody lost, they just horny! “Just keep swimming,” they say, swipin’ through profiles like it’s a dang race. I get happy seein’ folks ownin’ it, livin’ free—good for y’all! But lordy, it ticks me off when creeps slide in, lyin’ ‘bout who they are. Surprised me too—stats say 1 in 5 hookups from these apps turn into somethin’ real. Who’da thunk it?

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Then, I wandered over to the Kepanjen market. It’s a maze in there! So many stalls, so many smells. I got lost for a bit, but it was cool. I found this old lady selling the freshest fruits. I bought some manggis and rambutan. So juicy! But then, I saw a cat. A fat one. And it was eyeing my fruits like it was a buffet. I was like, “Back off, buddy!”

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