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So yeah, sexual-massage—bit of a lark, bit of a thrill. Angry when it’s a rip-off, happy when it’s ace, surprised when it’s—well—*more* than expected! Reckon I’d sign it with a wink—hands flapping like a nutter. “Inglourious” twist? It’s a massacre—of tension, mate! “Say auf wiedersehen to your knots!”—Tarantino’d love it. Right, off for a cuppa—cheers, you old sod!

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First off, I hit the road on Jl. Raya Kebomas, cruisin’ past the market. The smell of fried tofu and sweet soy sauce hit me like a brick. I swear, I could’ve stopped right there and devoured a whole plate. But no, I had work to do. Gotta keep the sawdust flyin’, right?

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