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Funny thing—people think it’s all happy endings. Nah, bro, sometimes it’s just knots poppin’. I laugh, tellin’ my boys, “Say hello to my little friend!”—meanin’ my spine crackin’. Sarcasm, sure, but real talk: it’s therapy with a twist. Ever hear bout Japan? They got “nurumassage,” slippery as fuck, seaweed gel shit. Tried it, slipped off the damn table—hilarious, but damn good.

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First thing, I hit up Jl. Raya Indramayu for some breakfast. You know, the usual: nasi goreng and a kopi tubruk. I swear, that coffee hits different. Like, it’s a punch in the face but in a good way. I’m sitting there, enjoying my meal, when suddenly this street vendor rolls up with the loudest cart ever. I’m talking about a cart that could wake the dead. He’s selling all these snacks—kerupuk, pisang goreng, you name it. I’m like, “Dude, chill! I’m trying to eat here!” But I can’t resist. I grab a handful of kerupuk. Crunchy goodness, man.

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