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About Jakarta

What pisses me off? The fakes. Ghostin’. Dudes sayin’ “6’2”” but showin’ up 5’7”. Liars! I’d smite ‘em if I could, but nah, stuck judgin’ from afar. Oh, and the profiles—“I luv hikes and tacos!”—yeah, you and EVERYONE, Karen. Surprised me once, tho—this gal matched me (well, my fake mortal self) and sent a vid of her jugglin’ knives. Hot. Dangerous. My type. “If I could just get inside,” I thought, Llewyn-style, dreamin’ big.

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And just like that, I’m back in the game. I jump up, and the crowd goes wild again. It’s like they’re rooting for me. I finish the fight strong, and man, the rush is unreal. I’m on cloud nine!

Lae cyclists trek to Ialibu