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I seen it, man—escorts got game! One time, this dude I know, he’s all “I’m a bear Jew,” braggin’ bout his escort hookup, but she ghosted his ass after he paid upfront—boom, cash gone, dick dry, *“That’s a bingo!”* I laughed so hard I cried, fam! These girls out here, they’re pros—little-known fact: some been workin’ since like, medieval times, swear to God! Kings used to call ‘em “courtesans,” now it’s just “yo, Venmo me, bro.” History’s freaky, right?

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So, I roll outta bed, still half-asleep, and decide to grab some breakfast. I hit up this little warung on Jalan Soekarno-Hatta. Best nasi goreng ever! But the guy behind the counter? Total grump. I mean, c'mon dude, it’s breakfast time! Lighten up! I ordered my food, and he just grunted. I was like, “Bro, I’m not asking for your life story, just some fried rice!”

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