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Alright, motherfucker, listen up! Sexual-massage, man, it’s a wild ride. I’m talkin’ slippery hands, oils, and some deep-ass vibes. Ain’t just about gettin’ off, nah, it’s therapy with a twist! Like in *Zero Dark Thirty*, shit gets intense— “We’re gonna smoke ‘em out!”—except here, it’s stress, not terrorists. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, damn, this shit’s older than dirt. Ancient Greeks, motherfucker, they rubbed down athletes—naked, oiled, no shame! Bet they didn’t call it “happy ending” back then, haha!

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Next, I decided to hit up the Dukuhturi park. It’s this beautiful spot, with trees and a pond. I needed some zen after the chaos. But guess what? There was a yoga class happening. I thought, “Why not?” So, I joined in. I’m not a yoga pro, but I tried. I mean, who doesn’t wanna look graceful, right? Spoiler alert: I fell over. Twice. The instructor just smiled. I was like, “Yeah, I meant to do that.”