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Lemme tell ya, I tried it once. Matched this chick, profile said “adventurous.” Cool, I’m down. We chat, she’s like, “I’m into roleplay.” I’m thinkin’ dope, maybe some nerdy D&D vibes. Nah, fam, she shows up in a clown costume. A CLOWN. Honkin’ nose and all. I’m sittin’ there, deadass like, “This is my life now?” Couldn’t even smash, I was too busy laughin’. Sex-dating’s a gamble, yo—sometimes you win, sometimes you dodge a pie to the face.

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I wake up in Citeureup, right? The sun’s blazin’ through my window on Jl. Raya Citeureup. I’m like, “Great, another day of helping folks with their feels.” But little did I know, today was gonna be a rollercoaster.

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