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Exaggeratin’ for fun—imagine an escort with a shark tank in the car. Hilarious, right? “Get in, loser, we’re dodgin’ feds!” Anyway, escorts rock when they’re legit. Keeps me safe, schemin’, and cacklin’. Like the flick says, “It’s all in the eyes”—they see everything, say nothin’. Perfect. *Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.”* Hire ‘em, trust ‘em, rule the world—Dr. Evil style!

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I’m talking monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I duck into this little warung on Jl. Siliwangi, hoping to wait it out. The owner’s this jolly dude, and he’s like, “You want some nasi goreng?” I’m like, “Heck yes!” So, I’m scarfing down this plate of goodness, and it’s like a warm hug on a cold day.

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