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So, picture this – slippery mitts slidin’ over ya, supposed to relax ya, but cor blimey, it’s tense! Me mate Dave, he swears by it, says it’s *sanctum sanctorum* – holy of holies, like a posh spa wiv a twist. I tried it once, right? In Clapham, dodgy parlour, neon sign flickerin’ like a drunk winkin’. Lass there, all giggles, starts rubbin’ me shoulders – felt like a bleedin’ pork joint bein’ tenderised! “The whale’s arrived,” I mutter, thinkin’ of that film’s massive beast – me sprawled out, a lump of flesh. Made me chuckle, then bloody hell, she digs in – ow! – nearly leapt off the table.

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1, Followers, 1, Following, 56 Posts - SPA HOME SERVICE BOYOLALI (@www.facebook.comli) on Instagram: "Kalian #dirumahaja 🏡 biar kami yang datang 🌸 .

After that fiasco, I’m back to work. But then, my shears? They start actin’ up. Like, c’mon! I just sharpened these bad boys! I’m gettin’ mad, like, “Why today of all days?” I’m sweatin’ bullets, and the sheep are just chillin’, lookin’ at me like I’m the crazy one.

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