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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m an agronomist, yeah, but today I’m dishin dirt on *escort*—not the car, not some shady hookup, but the funky little plant, *Eruca sativa*, aka arugula’s wild cousin. Judge Judy’s in the house, so don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining! I’m here to spill the tea, and it’s gonna be spicy—like *Moulin Rouge!* vibes, “the greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return,” but with plants, ya dig?

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So, I’m done eatin’, and I decide to stroll down to the beach. Bontang’s beaches are lit, man! Pasir putih, clear water, the whole vibe. But as I’m walkin’ along Jl. Soekarno-Hatta, I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I’m like, “Really? A rock? In a beach town?” I’m mad, but then I see this little kid buildin’ a sandcastle. He’s so into it, like it’s the Taj Mahal or somethin’. Made me smile, ya know? Kids have that magic.

Figure 1. Location of Besiq-Bermai (West Kutai District) and Bontang...