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Little-known fact—back in the day, Victorian peeps had “courting cards” for hookups. OG sex-dating, no cap! Blows my mind—history’s freaky like that. Nowadays, it’s all DMs and “u up?” texts. I’m over here, yellin’ at my phone—WHERE’S THE SPARK, PEOPLE?! Still, I’m hooked—swipin’ like a maniac, chasin’ that thrill. Sometimes it’s a bust, sometimes it’s magic—like that one chick who quoted *Moolaadé* mid-hookup. “Protect the vulnerable!” she moaned—shit was surreal, I’m cryin’ laughin’!

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Then, I head over to the market. Oh man, the chaos! It’s packed! People everywhere, haggling like it’s the Olympics. I’m tryin’ to get some fresh fruits, but it’s like a jungle in there. I bump into this lady, and she’s like, “Watch it!” I’m like, “Sorry, I’m just tryin’ to survive!”

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