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Favorite bit? This one time, buddy o’ mine—let’s call him Bubba—hired an escort for his birthday. She shows up, all sass, smokin’ hot, and starts quotin’ Shakespeare! I’m like, “Lordy, I’m happier than a pig in mud!” Blew my dang mind—thought escorts just, y’know, clock in, clock out. Nope! Some got brains bigger than their—well, you get it. Git-R-Done!

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I head back home, and I’m just exhausted. But you know what? I wouldn’t trade this crazy day for anything. Vamospercs, you’ve got my heart. Even with the pigeon poop and the weird pastries. Can’t wait for tomorrow!

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