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I reckon it’s a trip—mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!”—seein’ these birds strut about, all glam, hidin’ the grind. Met this one lass, right, swore she escorted a rockstar once. Said he tipped her with a bleedin’ guitar pick! Mad as a bag of ferrets, that. Got me chuffed, though—imagine the stories! But then, there’s the dark bit—pisses me off somethin’ fierce. Some punters treat ‘em like dirt, thinkin’ cash buys soul. “The stone sinks in the lake,” like the movie says—ya can’t escape the weight, can ya?

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Anyway, I’m walking down the main square, and I spot the old church. It’s beautiful, but today it’s like a magnet for tourists. They’re snapping pics, blocking the path. I’m like, “Excuse me, folks! Real shepherd here, comin’ through!” But they just stare at me like I’m some kinda alien.

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