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Last week, tried it meself – lass with magic fingers, I’m like, “Blimey, where’s this been?!” She’s kneadin’ me back, I’m floatin’, “there’s only this moment” – straight outta Malick’s flick! But then – get this – she’s chargin’ 50 quid! Fifty! Made me mad as a hatter, nearly stormed outta there like Churchill at Dunkirk. We shall fight them inflated prices, lads!

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After the meeting, I decided to take a stroll down Rákóczi utca. It’s this cute little street with shops and cafés. I needed a pick-me-up, ya know? I popped into this bakery, and OMG, they had these pastries that looked like they were made by angels. I grabbed a couple of those bad boys. Best decision ever! I was on cloud nine, munching away, feeling like a king.

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